July 20, 2010

Oh Dear Lord Help ME!!

I did somethign stupid.  I wanted to help a friend of mine so I volunteered to watch her little sister for this week from 8am until 5:30-6PM. WORST DECISION EVER. OMG. AM DYING!

She is not a difficult child (she is 10) but I haven't been feeling well and yesterday I started to see sparkly black balls and then multicolor circles and I felt like I was about to hit the pavement.  When I am at home, my in laws help me with my son so I can take naps during the day.  I feel bad doing that at her house seeing as am supposed to be taking care of her little sister, so am suffering.  

I volunteered for the sake of Allah swt and because my friend really needed it.  I really should have considered my health and the fact that I will be taking care of a VERY VERY VERY active toddler ALL by myself ALL day.  Its too late now I can't back down and although I want to, that would be completely irresponsible.  My friend did not have anyone to take care of her sister once her family back out, her mom is still in Latin America cleared of all drug charges, ALHAMDULILLAH! some jerk bag tried to use her as a drug mule and sneaked a package for his "grandma" when she visited her country and she has spent the last 2 years in a South American prison.  She is now in the final stages trying to get her residency status cleared.

The little girl felt bad because she kept being passed around the family like hot potatoes and no one wanted to take responsibility. So I volunteered after an older sister said she wouldn't do it anymore and my friend had no way of finding a child sitter on Sunday (when she found out).  

BTW. I HATE THAT HOUSE! hate it! hate it! hate it!

I don't know what the heck is going on in there (I go to her house because I didn't want to bring her to my in laws).  Yesterday was my first day there and I left with the deepest depression I have experienced in recent memory.  Its quite suffocating and creepy.  I dread going.

Also my litttle dude refuses to go up the stairs to their house and I think its because there is this statue of an old man made out of wood bigger than my toddler. He refuses to walk through that hallway without being carried.  Once he is pass this area he is ok, giggly and active.

Creepy old house.  4 more days people. 4 more days and hopefully that buys her enough time to find someone else to take care of her sister.  Make du'a for me as I start the second day with only 3-4 hrs of sleep.  NOOOO!!!


4 comments:

Kiddy said...

You're not sick you are seeing a vision of the beauty of God similar to the one I had,also you have a gift of decrement, so does little dude,you too are picking up demonic things in the Spirit.

You sure are a busy little beaver today because you are also working and singing with me, check it out folks,and I hear you will achieve world fame,you are called to the nations.Specifically South America I believe:
http://friendfeed.com/krystalbell1/
http://

Irendi said...

Awww...I'm in a similar situation, but not quite the same. Try to get more sleep...you'll need it.

I'll make dua for you.

Hajar said...

Hopes she'll be able to find someone soon! Take care and try to get more sleep!

Kiddy said...

Sorry discernment.To go to sleep I find serenity and peace that lulls me there by putting on number 5 John Belt's Sacred Fire on repeat,but use caution while driving while playing it,it's better suited for the bed chamber in my opinion:
www.liveinhispresence.com.May you rest well and skip the protein to get you to sleep eat just carbohydrate.

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