April 27, 2010

nothing but pipe dreams and lies

In the name of Allah, compassionate & merciful بِسْمِ اللهِ الرَّحْمنِ الرَّحِيمِ
Peace be with you السلام عليكم

In one of my facebook pages this lady is trying to convince me that you can be promiscuous and happy because she is.  I told her that she should keep telling herself that and one day hopefully she will believe it.  It's funny the lies some people tell when they think you have no experience.  She believes that because I am a Muslim niqabi I don't know what am talking about, I am not some wide eye foreigner who has never seen a woman wear a micro mini skirt that looks like a belt.  Been there and done that honey and you can't lie to me.  I have held way too many heads as they puke their guts out, I have kept friends hostage in my dorm room (and sometimes theirs) because they were too drunk to be wandering campus.  I have counseled way too many friends (and strangers, college does that to you) after one night stands (theirs not mine).  I have seen too many classmates walk back to their dorms with their clothing disheveled and their panties ON TOP of their shorts.  Mine you, my college was in the middle of a major city so these girls were walking through traffic looking like that.  I don't even know how many of them had been taken advantage of. *shudders*

I have bumped in to naked bodies as I was trying to make it to the shared bathroom.  Have seen and heard more people doing it than a budding porn aficionado (NOT by choice it's just that people are too drunk to have shame).   I have been to parties at a friend's college (Rutgers New Brunswick, side note: absolutely GAWGEOUS campus)  and as my friends and I were going for breakfast you could see a whole mess of girls coming out of the woods all messed up with a cop car nearby taking statements.  SO NO sweetie, you cannot sell me your pipe dream story.  

According to her definition of what a liberated woman is, it seems that the most liberated women in our societies must be the prostitutes.  I have spoken to many prostitutes (what? am a friendly person) and that is not the reaction I get from them.  She has this romanticized version of the sexual liberation so I told her that choices come with consequences and she should really speak to people who lived during that time to get a more balanced view.  I also told her she should speak to some old school feminists who had POSITIVE change for women.

btw she tried to backpedal and approach me in a different way after she realized her tactic wasn't working.  Can't stand liars.

I feel that YOUR life is YOUR choice and I am not going to be your personal assistant when it comes to these choices (unless your inebriated).  But I am not going to lie to you. CHOICES HAVE CONSEQUENCES AND THEY AREN'T ALWAYS PEACHY.

pretty woman is only a movie and allowing men (or women whichever way you swing) to abuse you is NOT empowerment.  If you choose to live your life that way than that is up to you but don't confuse it with being liberated.  nope.  I would also suggest getting checked every 6 months.


NtN said...

Yeah, that attitude is so much more prevalent now and it's ridiculous. There's a book called "Unhooked," which is an analysis of the hook-up culture that clearly drives home the point of how detrimental it is to women. (Also a really good read) Women's hormones, such as oxytocin, are emitted during kissing and sexual acts to bond with the individual being kissed/acted with. It's not something you can be liberated from. Allah SWT made us this way for a reason.

(Side note, men's saliva apparently also has a chemical in it that activates womanly desires. Gotta love the human body!)


Mellika said...

Great post. May I ask what Facebook page it is? I would love to take a look at it.

.::Tuttie::. said...

"niqabis on facebook" page.

Irendi said...

Good for you!!! I'm glad you wrote this- many more need to see it.

Experience trumps blabber!!!

Mellika said...

Thanks Tuttie :D

Mellika said...

Yes, this brings me to think about what a shame it is that modern/western societies have stopped respecting and trying to learn form their elders. There is so much wisdom being wasted. And to be blunt, once they're gone, they're gone! I could spend hours talking to my grandparents, about anything and everything. I weep for the future.

Mellika said...

Tuttie no pude encontrar esa pagina en Facebook :(

.::Tuttie::. said...

if you click on the "others" you will see the post from other people. Don't engage her though, I am learning that it was a mistake. She isn't there to learn but rather to argue and its pointless.

She hasn't been able to get a "GOTCHA!" on anything with me which is why she keeps engaging me. She wants me to say something that will go against my beliefs just for kicks. She and her other friend trolling the page are atheist and I haven't banned them because so far they haven't been belligerent just ignorant.