November 21, 2009

dang it. what do I do???

My brother's girlfriend is trying to befriend me on facebook. what do I do? they are both non Muslims so they wouldn't understand my position anyway. What do I do??

I don't want to encourage it but I don't want to alienate him either. What do I do?


Anonymous said...

Perhaps it depends on what sort of person she is...I mean I have a few people on fb who I think must be a bit weirded by some of what I post...but maybe they are afraid to delete me, lol.

I take issue when others are posting innappropriate things though, lots of swearing, pictures of their husbands or boyfriends that are somehow showing up where I don't want to see them. Maybe it has to to with how much they've opted to share? some people shouldn't share so much! In those cases, like recently with a friend (acquaintence type) I deleted her because she takes nude pics. Artisitc...but still :O

So for me it would be more an issue as to what your brothers girlfriend was posting...I mean if she has asked you befriend her then surely she has thought about how you're different but still wants that connection?

Sorry to go anon this time

Hijab Chic said...

As salam alaykum Sister,

it's up to you, but I don't think that's a problem if you don't have any inappropriate pics on there... And it goes without saying that a Muslimah shouldn't have any inappropriate pics on Facebook anyways :)

hispanic muslimah said...

you don't have to give anybody reasons or excuses. if you don't feel good about adding her, save yourself the trouble and click reject.

Stephanie said...

Is she like a serious girlfriend that could some day be your sister in law, or just a flavor of the week type thing? For me that would make a difference in my decision.

Sarah said...

you know ppl are always dumping eachother , no guarantee they'll be a couple forever.

Sweet said...

Is she someone you would be friends with were she not your brother's girlfriend? This would sway my decision, but I am guessing that you don't know her that well.

Anonymous said...

Hi! I feel strongly about Facebook (which I know some people enjoy...)... Here are a few things to think about:
1. A lot of facebook goers just invite people for the sake of numbers. The more numbers they have as "friends" the better they feel about themselves.
2. If you aren't friends outside of Facebook, then why pretend in Facebook?
3. Ask you brother why his gf wants to be friends with you on Facebook... She is not his fiance' or wife, so you are not obliged to reach out to her.
4. If your FB is private, accepting her invite opens your privacy to someone you don't necessarily like.
5. In the end, it is not a big deal. If you reject her invite, what are you worried about? That she will be upset with you? Do you care if she is?


Kiddy said...

Yes exactly,a good point Anonymous,so what if you reject her as a friend?Maybe it's time for her to wake up and turn to God instead of men.It might just be cost affective to start being impolite to and offend people that are on their way to hell like your brother's girl friend,so that she will come to the point of desperation, as all the people let her down and she has no alternative but to turn to God.

.::Tuttie::. said...

@cabin you are right. The straightforward answer would be best.